The World According to Mike

Lost

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 18:37:24 GMT

Swearing Provides Pain Relief, Say Scientists

Thu, 16 Jul 2009 11:57:24 GMT

Fuck, yeah, it does...

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=why-do-we-swear

Hi! Billy Mays here for the Cozy Coffin!

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 18:47:15 GMT

Heeeeeeeere's Ed!

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 16:23:38 GMT

I wonder if they're hanging out together again on the Tonight Show stage in Heaven, with Bob Hope as their permanent guest...

Einstein

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 14:15:26 GMT

This is great -- an Einstein chalkboard generator: http://tr.im/p3vm

July 18, 2009 - A Date Which Will Live in Infamy

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 21:27:03 GMT

Noted without comment.

How to Get Over the Hump

Mon, 01 Jun 2009 13:26:01 GMT

Doug Mackey over at BleacherReport.com wrote an interesting article that not only tore apart the Cavaliers for all of their weaknesses, but showed exactly how to put them all back together again, as the strongest team in the NBA.

Read the article here.

Locke Has Something to Say

Thu, 28 May 2009 19:40:05 GMT

Locke Has Something to Say
Originally uploaded by r3mdh

A Photoshop creation of mine and a nod to Jay of Jay and Jack that he's not the only Locke fan out there.

What's Wrong With the Cavaliers?

Wed, 27 May 2009 16:13:50 GMT

What has happened to the team with the NBA's best record, the League MVP and the Coach of the Year? They're down 3-1 to the Orlando Magic and historically-speakinghave a 3% shot of advancing to the NBA Finals. Only 8 teams in the history of the NBA have come back from a 3-1 deficit to advance to the Finals. If that miracle is to happen, several changes are going to have to be made. If you look at stats alone, the problem becomes obvious - Head Coach Mike Brown is not making the personnelsubstitutions that absolutely need to be made in order to stop the losing.

Let's break down some key stats:

LeBron James is averaging 3.10 more minutes per game in the playoffs than in the regular season. It's become quite obvious that the rest of the team isn't pullingtheir weight, making it necessary for LeBron to get only 9 minutes of rest each game. He was used to 12 (an entire quarter). LeBron's freethrow average is down slightly, as are his assists per game (no one to pass to?) and blocks per game. He's virtually on-par with his regular season play except for these key stats: his defensive rebounds are way up (an extra 1.4 per game in the playoffs), his turnovers are down (0.4 less in the playoffs) and his points per game have gone up 7.6. That last statistic is evidence that the rest of the team isn't showing up, forcing LBJ to do it all. One man can't do it all. Even Michael Jordan could rely onScotty Pippen to contribute.

Mo Williams has been a playoffs disappointment. His FG percentage, 3-point percentage, free throw percentage, defensive rebounds, steals per game and points per game are all down. Scotty Pippen he is not. LeBron is stepping up his game; why can't Mo?

Delonte West is playing an identical game in the playoffs as he did in the regular season. It's good that his numbers aren't dropping, but he too needs to step it up.

Anderson Varejao's defensive rebounds are way down (2 per game less) as are his assists. These are the reasons he's in the game in the first place. Andy isn't a scoring machine; Coach Brown doesn't start him for the points. He's in there to gobble up loose balls and get the ball to a scorer. He isn't doing either of those particularly well, as compared to his regular season statistics.

Zydrunas Ilgauskas...where to start? Z's defensive rebounds and assists are slightly up, but every other recordable statistic is way down. This appears to be Z's swan song; he's out of gas. His 3-point percentage is WAY down (he's shooting .154 when he normally shoots .385), his free throw percentage is down, his offensive rebounds are down, as are steals per game, blocks per game and points per game (down 2.10 points). Z didn't show up for the playoffs. Perhaps it's time to slash his minutes? Perhaps, however, it's too late to do anything right now.

Mike Brown has stuck with those starting 5 throughout all 12 games of the playoffs. He has not wavered from this even once. Perhaps Coach Brown is becoming way too predictable. His team certainly is. When it comes down to the wire, we all know who is going to get the ball - LeBron. No one else will ever get the ball. Yet, we know that this team is full of players who can come through in clutch situations: Mo, Delonte, Joe Smith, Daniel Gibson...they've all shown in the past that they can do this. Why is Coach Brown so stuck in his ways? He is undoubtedly a defensive guru. But his offensive planning and play-calling are laughably predictable. And it's hurting this team when the games matter most.

Now, let's look at the other players who have for some reason fallen out of favor with Coach Brown...

Joe Smith is averaging 1.5 minutes less per game. Wally has had 7.9 minutes taken away from him. Daniel Gibson is averaging 13.10 minutes less per game in the playoffs and Sasha Pavlovic 6.6 less. But the glaring omission from the court has been Ben Wallace. Big Ben is averaging 11.30 minutes less per game in the playoffs than the regular season and his absence is KILLING THIS TEAM. When Ben has actually had playing time, his FG percentage has been way up (.750 vs. .445 in the regular season). Why isn't he getting more minutes? As a result of his lack of playing time, we're missing out on 4 rebounds per game and over 1 block per game. Those rebounds and blocks could be the game-changing difference we've needed in games that have been decided by fewer than 4 points. Would we be in this 3-1 hole if Ben Wallace was playing more?

As a result of cutting minutes for all but the 5 starters, the team is playing tired. Against a team that is a fast-paced 3-point-shooting juggernaut, this is a fatal mistake. You need to have fresh legs in there at all times against the Orlando Magic. The Cavaliers have the talent necessary to advance to the NBA Finals and dare I say it - actually win the title. But their coach has chosen a bad time to start making critical mistakes, and it's going to extend the Cleveland Curse at least another year, I'm afraid. And when LeBron's contract is up after next season, do you honestly think he's gonna stay here in Cleveland when the historical greatness of an NBA player is measured in rings? Here in Cleveland, LeBron has no rings.

I don't see that changing, and it breaks my heart.

Why the Pistons Won't Get Out of the First Round

Mon, 20 Apr 2009 14:50:37 GMT

To sum it up in a single picture:

Pistons GM Joe Dumars should be taken out behind the barn and shot for his Iverson trade. The November 3, 2008 trade sent Chauncey Billups, Antonio McDyess and Cheikh Samb (who?) to Denver in return for has-been player (but always-will-be thug) Iverson. Losing Billups and McDyess were the final two nails in the Pistons' coffin. They're no longer the same team that dominated the Eastern Conference Central Division from 2004-2008.

The team has gone into a tailspin considering these key changes (besides the obvious aging of the players themselves):

1. Lost Ben Wallace to Chicago in 2006.
2. Fired Head Coach Flip Saunders, hired Michael Curry.
3. Lost Billups and McDyess (although reacquired McDyess 33 days later after he was released by Denver).
4. Added Iverson to roster.

Ben Wallace has never truly been replaced yet. Rasheed Wallace is a natural Power Forward, yet he is the Pistons' center this season.

Flip Saunders was fired not because of his lack of skills as head coach, but because he didn't play nicely with head-honcho Joe Dumars. So, he brings in Michael Curry - who is clearly not the right man for the job. Curry has mangled the starting lineup (he played Iverson and Richard Hamilton as sixth men!) and has completely disrupted team chemistry. When the Pistons have an early exit from the playoffs this season (insead of being in the Eastern Conference Finals like they were last year), the egg will be all over Dumars' face, not Saunders'.

Billups was a huge loss for the Pistons. He was the only Denver Nugget in the All-Star game.

Allen Iverson is a CANCER. Not only is he disruptive to a team already shaken up, but he now wears street clothes when his team needs him the most because of a "back injury". Truth be told, he had stated that he wanted to be traded instead of coming off the bench. Curry benched him because of his disruptiveness to the team, his tardiness to practice, and mouthing off to the head coach. So, does he learn his lesson and work hard to prove his worth? No - he whines to the press about wanting to be traded. So, now instead of being there in the playoffs, he sits on the sidelines in street clothes, being the total waste of a basketball player that he is. Chauncey Billups would not have been like that. Billups would have netted several more wins for his basketball team, and not left them in the last-place seed that they are in against the mighty Cleveland Cavaliers. Detroit doesn't stand a chance. If they win a game, it will have to be in Detroit, and only because the NBA needs more money, not because they actually did anything to pull out a victory.

As of this year, the powerhouse that was the Detroit Pistons is no more. Halleluiah!

End of an Era...

Thu, 16 Apr 2009 14:56:19 GMT

Boom! Tough-actin' Tinactin! Ace is the place! It's time for a Bloomin' Onion! Rent-to-own at Rent-a-Center! And, let's not forget the Telestrator.

What on earth is Frank Caliendo going to do with himself? Maybe he'll have to get a real job now...

It's a sad day. One of my heroes is stepping out of the limelight...

Hall of Famer John Madden is officially retiring.

For Beej...

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 20:59:14 GMT

When life gets you down and you're so overwhelmed by the task at hand, refer to this little nugget of wisdom:

"Let's [just] do what we're capable of doing. And while we're at it, let's have a little fun."
--Sam Rutigliano

In other words, do what you can do today and come back tomorrow for more. Don't try so hard to accomplish your goal all at once that you fill yourself with an overwhelming ache to give up. Know your limits, but keep trying to extend those limits. Keep trying; you're continued and consistent effort will eventually yield the results you seek. And while you're on your journey, don't forget to take time to enjoy life. Your brain and heart will thank you for the stress-relief.

More about Sam here.

The 27 Club

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 22:24:21 GMT

The 27 Club
Originally uploaded by r3mdh

Felt creative tonight. "The 27 Club" - original artwork that I created in Photoshop 7 as a tribute to "The 27 Club" - rock gods that all died when they were 27 years old.

This Wednesday, April 8, 2009, will mark 15 years since Seattle police discovered the body of Kurt Cobain. Time sure has gone by fast...

Smokers Ready to Lynch Democrats

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 13:43:19 GMT

http://www.cantonrep.com/lifestyle/x1950208767/Smokers-are-smoking-over-higher-tobacco-tax

I love how stupid the liberal voters are. They stupidly and lazily vote Democrat in every election, then have the nerve to be irate when those same Democrats increase their taxes (in this case, the SIN tax on tobacco). Uh, hello idiots! Democrats are all about bigger government and higher taxes to pad their legislator-for-life wallets. Why haven't the lib voters figured this out already? The same thing happens over and over - they get hammered with taxes, throw a fit, then when the next election comes along they magically "forget" and vote Democrat again. Friggin' idiots. Do yourself a favor - vote REPUBLICAN. (Of course, that means we have to actually have some non-RINO candidates to vote for *cough*McCain*cough*Voinovich*cough*, but I digress...)

I don't believe that the Democrats are "tax-and-spend". You don't honestly believe that most of the sin tax is going to pay for gap-insurance for welfare people do you? You don't honestly believe that all lottery funds go to the schools do you? Hell no. I believe a better term for the Dems is "tax-and-pocket". They keep the extra money for themselves. They're living fat, happy lives in Washington and Columbus while the rest of us sacrifice for their over-indulgent lifestyles. This is the very reason I don't give to United Way. "Oh, but Mike, you're so cruel! United Way does so much good!" Why, then, do the top officials running United Way make 6-figure salaries? (No, that isn't an exaggeration - those figures are in public records. I looked it up myself.) When the head-honchos over there at United Way decide to live normal lives like the rest of us and make the same kind of sacrifices that the rest of us make, THEN I'll consider garnishing my own wages to fund their socialism. Can't have it both ways, hypocrites. Either you live by the same rules by which you govern the rest of us, or get the hell out of our way.

If this rampant socialism continues in this country, and we continue to live in a world where the Democrats force us to "live as I say, not as I do", Boston Harbor is going to get flooded with tea again. And if in this recession we're suffering through, gas prices continue to creep up-and-up...by summertime, this country is going to be a powderkeg just waiting to explode. Better get a good home security system (think Mastiffs or Rotts), because here comes the crime!

(Imagine how upset I'd be if I was actually a smoker! Whoa, baby, look out!)

Things to Ponder

Tue, 24 Mar 2009 15:36:13 GMT

Why do we park in a driveway and drive through a parkway?
Why is the Red Lobster sign blue?
Why don't we get goosebumps on our face?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
Which fruits are in Juicy Fruit?
Is there another word for synonym?
What does Geronimo yell when he jumps out of an airplane?
Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
Which is messier: to be dirt poor, or filthy rich?
When you erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
What was the best thing BEFORE the advent of sliced bread in 1928?
Why is it called a TV "set", when you only get one?
Did George Washington just flash a dollar bill for his ID?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Don't Check Your Self-Respect at the Door

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 17:36:50 GMT

The people who never make more than minimum wage can do far better if they're just invested in themselves. Not in a government, not in a president, not a congress, not a program. How many people in those people's lives tell them that they're special? Versus how many tell them "you don't have a chance. You don't have a prayer. This country's racist! It's homophobic! It's bigoted! You don't have a chance. You need to vote for us."

Even I, ladies and gentlemen... You listen to me and you look at me and you see whatever you see, but you see me as successful. It may make you mad, it may make you furious. But nevertheless, you see me successful. But you don't know the 35-37 years that I've spent in this business, since I was 16, minus five that I worked for the Kansas City Royals baseball team... you don't know the seven times that I got fired and you don't know how many people in this business told me to quit and told me to give it up. That it's not a fair business and even if you're good, there's too many idiots above you, too many jealous people above you that don't want you to get anywhere because you're better than them.

Hey, hello - that's the world.

There are a lot of professors that don't want you to be smarter than they are. There are a lot of people working at banks who are tellers that could probably be working on the investment side, but somebody's threatened by them. Everybody's trying to hold everybody back. It's just human nature.

And it's only the belief in yourself that propels you through all of those things, and yourself as the individual.

I got fired seven times. One time was it probably justified. The other times due to vagaries of the broadcast business. But each time I got fired, the guy firing me said "you know, you really don't have what it takes to succeed here. If you want to stay in this business you need to go into sales or something else because you really don't have that much talent." And I'm saying to myself "how would you know? You've never let me exhibit it. You and your brilliant management have come up with ways that I can only say this here or that there and I can only take that much time ... How do you know what my talent is? And when was the last time you cared to really find what my talent is?"

Without believing in yourself, you're going nowhere.

And you won't believe in yourself if somebody beats the individual out of you. If somebody convinces you that you don't deserve to do any better than anybody else because that's not fair... And they are teaching you that in school, about your grades ... And they're teaching you that about economics, that it's not fair that you drive a nicer car than the schlub down the street, it's not fair, it's humiliating to the people who have less. So they're trying to beat the individual out of you and the individual in you--the belief in yourself--is the only thing you've got to compete against everybody that's trying to hold you back. And they all are. It's the way of the world.

You look at things from afar. You look at pop-culture. You look at movie stars. And you think that's a community and they all decided one day that Cameron Diaz is great and they all got together and they all love Cameron Diaz and they've all made her a big star... That's the image they project because they want you to think it's all a giant -- Cameron Diaz is just like everybody else. She had to fight for everything she has. And they're nipping at her heels as she gets older, same thing with Julia Roberts. It doesn't change. No matter where you are, no matter what kind of glamor. You take a look around you: the genuinely successful people, the people that you want to be, did not check their individualism at the door when they started their work. They didn't check their self-interest at the door and they didn't check their self-respect. And they didn't turn over the belief in themselves to somebody else.

That's all I'm talking about.

And that's all under assault by this administration which wants to control and limit freedom because the only way Obama can get the power that he wants and the Democrats can get the power they want is if you willingly turn it over to them. By getting rid of your self-interests and your self-respect... Your best interests do not coincide with your government's.

Especially now.

--Rush Limbaugh, March 20, 2009

An Evening With George Takei

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 14:19:46 GMT

My friend Chad and I are going to see George Takei at the Players Guild in Canton on April 1.

The show is described as such:

George Takei, best known for his portrayal of Mr. Sulu on the Star Trek series, is currently a recurring guest star on NBC's Heroes and can be seen in the film The Great Buck Howard starring John Malkovich, opening this March. While at the Players Guild, Mr. Takei will speak on his experience and rise to fame as one of the world's most famous Japanese American actors. Join us for this one night only event.

Our seats are indicated by the red squares and arrows:

I'm pretty excited. While I was never a Star Trek fan (the only movie I ever saw was the 4th one with the whales), I do enjoy George's performances on Heroes as Kaito Nakamura (Hiro's dad) and as the official announcer on The Howard Stern Show. It's going to be difficult to not shout "Baba Booey!" when George takes the stage. ;-)

Just some random thoughts/questions on "Lost"...

Tue, 10 Mar 2009 18:21:17 GMT

Charles Widmore:
In 1954 he was a 17 year old kid. So it means he was born in 1937 (on The Island ... or off?). He is an Other. He speaks Latin. He is working with or for Richard. He said to Locke that they ruled peacefully for 30 years. At one point, Miles briefly mentioned (when asked if he was worried if Widmore would find them), "It took him 20 years to find this place. I wouldn't hold my breath." Miles said that in 2004.

1954 plus 30 equals 1984.
2004 minus 20 equals 1984.

So, this indicates that Charles was telling the truth to Locke. He was tricked into leaving The Island in 1984.

Who was the leader of the Others from 1984 until 1992? We are missing 8 years. (Note: 8 is one of The Numbers.)

If Charles wasn't the leader of the Others and wasn't even on The Island, then who ordered the Purge? We know it wasn't Ben. Or do we? In "Cabin Fever," Ben had a conversation with Hurley. Hurley asked Ben why he killed the Dharma Intitiative people. Ben said, "I didnt kill them. It wasn't my decision. It was their leaders'." Hurley: "I thought you were their leader." Ben: "Not always."

So who was their leader at that point, before Ben took over? Richard? He lost one leader (Widmore) and we know they choose another from a very young age. So maybe Richard temporarily assumed the role of leadership before someone else took over. Or, perhaps Ben lied; perhaps Ben did order the Purge. It wouldn't be the first time he lied.

If the Dharma Initiative people were gassed to death, then why do some of the skeletons have holes in their skulls? Were they shot in the head just to make sure they were dead? Did they commit suicide instead of breathing the gas? Or were some of those skeletons not D.I. people, but instead other people dumped into that pit with the D.I.? (I'm pretty sure, however, that at least one of the skeletons with a bullet hole in the head was wearing a D.I. jumpsuit.)

Back to Widmore...

So Charles is off The Island. We don't yet know how Ben tricked Widmore into leaving or how he left (likely, it was by turning the Wheel adjacent to the Orchid Station). When Ben visits Charles in London, Charles calls calls Ben 'boy', most likely because the last time they saw each other (when Ben tricked Widmore into leaving The Island), Ben was in his mid-20s and Charles was 47.  Furthermore, Charles said "I know WHAT you are boy." To me, that's creepy. "What" is Ben? Why did Widmore word it that way? "I know WHAT you are." Did he simply mean "evil", or did he mean something like "a thief" or ... ? Or something entirely different. With those buggy eyes of his, is Ben an alien?

Rewind back to the episode "Eggtown".  When Kate brings Miles to Ben, Miles asks for $3.2 million to keep his silence and not report back to Widmore on Ben's location.  When Ben tells him he doesn't have access to that kind of money, Miles tells him: 'Don't treat me like I am one of them. Like I don't know WHAT you are!' Again with the WHAT? Is Ben "The Economist"? Well that doesn't make sense, because Ben sent Sayid to kill "The Economist" in the episode of the same name. Unless Ben is a competing economist. I think that Miles was referring to WHAT Ben does for money off of The Island. His occupation, if you will. Is that the same big secret that Widmore was referring to? What Ben does to accumulate wealth?

So, Widmore is trying to find The Island for 20 years now. With enough money and determination you can find anyone. ANYONE. This bugs me - Charles Widmore has money. Charles Widmore grew up with the only person who knows how to find The Island, Eloise Hawking. She is his sister, or his lover, or a very very very close friend. He funded her son's (Daniel Faraday) reasearch and took care of his lost girl, Theresa. Why would he do that, unless he is very close to Ellie? And the way they talked in "Jughead" seemed like a chat between brother and sister. So he is very, very close to the one person who knows how to find The Island. And he was the one sending Locke via Abaddon on a walkabout that led him eventually to The Island. So he knew about Oceanic 815. He knew about Ajira 316. He knew about the solar race and Desmond crashing on The Island. He eventually sent The Freighter to The Island. Yet not once has he tried to go there by himself. WHY? What is preventing him? If he pushed the Wheel, it doesnt matter because both Ben and Locke pushed the Wheel and both of them have successfully returned to The Island. So what is preventing Charles from returning? Couldn't he have booked a ticket on Oceanic 815? Couldn't he have come out on The Freighter with Keamey, Charlotte, Daniel, Miles, Lapidus, The Doc, Michael "Kevin Johnson" Dawson, Minkowski, Naomi and everyone else? Seems to me that they would have had an extra room for him to sleep in. Or is his intent not to return to The Island, but to DESTROY it? Remember, Keamey said something about "torching The Island" when he read the Secondary Protocol manual. (And speaking of that - why did it have a Dharma Logo on it? If Widmore was an Other, why would he want anything to do with the Dharma Initiative? Why would he put their logo on something 12 years after the Purge?)

Back to the conversation in London between Widmore and Ben:

Charles: Why are you here? To kill me?
Ben: You know that I cannot do that.

Charles: I know who you are, what you are boy. Everything you have you took it from me. That island is mine.  Always was. It will be again.
Ben: But you will never find it.

Why can't Ben kill Charles? I can think of 3 reasons:
1. He is already dead.
2. The Island won't let him.
3. They are in a time loop and whatever happened, happened.

If The Island won't let him then The Island is not done with Widmore yet. Widmore needs to do something good for The Island before he dies.

More questions:

How did Charles and Ben meet and what went wrong between two of them?

Charles sent the Freighter to The Island in order to capture Ben, yet when Ben shows up at his London flat he does nothing? He finally has Ben. Many people died because of the Widmore/Ben feud, yet when Ben comes face-to-face with him, he does nothing? He just sips his whiskey and goes back to bed? WTF?

Ben: When did you start sleeping with the bottle of whiskey by you bed?
Charles: When the nightmares started.

What nightmares?  Why is Widmore having bad dreams? Is he having some "lost memories" like Desmond? We can assume that Charles is still on The Island in the 1970s where Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Juliet, Hurley, Miles, and Daniel are. Are one of them influencing future Charles by telling him things in his past, much like Daniel told Swan Station-Desmond to find Eloise Hawking and future-Desmond remembered those "lost memories" and decided to sail to Oxford? Are these "lost memories" the nightmares that Charles is referring to? Is Charles special like Desmond is?

Richard Alpert
We know he existed in 1954. Juliette said, "Richard was always here" and that he "is very old." He seemed as if he is not aware of time traveling. But if he was always there, then that's enough time to know a lot. And eventually he does learn about time travel from Locke and Sawyer. On May 30th, 1956, he went to California to witness Locke's birth. Why? Because time-traveling Locke told him to. And Richard was pleased to find out that Locke told the truth. He now feels that Locke is special. In the episode "Cabin Fever", Emily Locke was a young girl, probably 16 or 17 years old. The man she was dating was "twice her age", according to her mother. That would make Locke's dad 30-35 years old in 1956. Anthony Cooper doesn't seem like he could be that old.  Is he not Locke's dad? Was that a con too? Back to Richard ... so Richard saw Locke's birth and decided to wait. A few years later, he visited him again when Locke was 6 or 7 years old, circa 1962 or 1963. Richard saw a drawing on the wall, of the Smoke Monster killing someone (Mr. Eko?) or at least dragging them away (John himself?). Richard's reaction was pretty strange - he was either pleased that John could see visions of the future, scared that the vision was of the Smoke Monster, or both.  There was something more to that scene, but the dialogue didn't support it. So, we know that Richard knows about the Smoke Monster as early as 1962 - he clearly recognized it in John's drawing. Next, we see him testing 6-year-old Locke. I've always been puzzled with the objects that Richard chose: the knife, the compass, a vial of sand, a comic book, a baseball glove, and a book of laws. Clearly, the knife is what belonged to Locke. But Richard didn't know this yet - Locke didn't show Richard his cool case of shiny throwing knives when they met in 1954. The only possession that Locke and Richard exchanged in Richard's tent in 1954 was Richard's compass. So, when little Locke (correctly) chooses the knife, Richard seems disappointed. He thinks Locke should have chosen the compass. But all this shows is that Richard doesn't yet know the real John Locke. And little Locke, unlike old Locke, doesn't understand the symbolism of the time-traveling compass. And as for the other objects? I guess the vial of sand could represent The Island itself. Was Richard asking Locke if he thought The Island belonged to John? A comic book? No idea. Walt and Hurley like them, I guess. A baseball glove? The only person who has expressed an interest in baseball is Red Sox fan Jack Shephard. And the book of laws - again, I'm drawing a big question mark. So, when Richard abruptly gathers all of the objects and leaves, we assume that Locke failed the test.  Richard wasn't pleased anymore. In his eyes, this time-traveling John Locke isn't special. He isn't chosen by The Island or Jacob. Richard also showed us his bad themper and lack of manners. He just bolted without an explanation. Clearly, Locke's foster mom was shaken by the quick exit and thinks John did something bad.

Fast-forward to 1974 and the Dharma Initiative "hostiles alarm" goes off and everyone freaks out.  They're terrified. I was expecting to see a whole army of Hostiles/Others or the Smoke Monster, or something that would invoke that kind of irrational fear in so many people. But no - only one man comes out of the woods and jams his torch into the grass by the swingset. All of this fear for just Richard Alpert? The look on Juliet's face also spelled out "uh-oh!", and she's supposed to be on "his side". The only Dharma person to go outside to face the "menacing terror" that is Richard Alpert is Horace.  Why is everyone so afraid?  Of one man? So Sawyer walks out to talk to Richard in a moment that to me, resembled the scene in Back to the Future where Marty is convincing 1955 Doc that he came from 1985 in a time machine that Doc hasn't yet invented. That was a huge metaphoric bomb that Marty drops on the Doc and here, we have Sawyer talking about a literal bomb - Jughead. Richard didn't see that one coming. 20 years have passed and now he is talking to another time traveler. Is Sawyer special too? And then ... Richard asks for Paul's body? WTF?  Why does Richard need the body? He has to SHOW the Hostiles the corpse to convince them that the truce wasn't broken? "Hey, lookie here, y'all, I gots me one of 'dem Dharma folks all dead-like! If we roast him on this here fire for a few hours, we'll be eatin' good tonight!" If Richard is so damn important, why don't they just take his word for it? Assuming that Charles Widmore was the leader of the Others/Hostiles at this point, why doesn't he take Richard's word and convince his people that it was a mistake - that his two guys were killed in self-defence? Is there a problem brewing between Richard and Charles by 1974? It's clear that there was some tension between the two of them in 1954 - has it escalated by 1974? Does Richard con Ben into exiling Charles 10 years later, in 1984? Is Richard the ultimate con-man, the ultimate man-behind-the-man (Ben)? Or is there some significance to buring the dead and they needed Paul's body for some ceremony or ritual? That reminded me of Danielle and Karl buried. In the middle of the chaos between Keamey's attack on Ben/Locke/Sawyer/Claire/Miles, someone took the time to put them in the ground? Say what? Why did the Freighter mercenaries want to bury those two? On the opposite end of the spectrum, why is there a pit with a hundred Dharma folks in it, wide open? What's up with that? When it's one or two people, we bury them, but when it's just too much work, we just push all of the bodies into a pit and let them rot and stink for eternity? Imagine the stench and filth that Locke had to wade through as he hunted around in the pile of skeletons and maggots looking for Horace Goodspeed's body (and eventually the map to Jacob's cabin)? Yuck!

I don't think that atomic bombs and obtaining Paul's body were the only things that Richard and Sawyer talked about. Richard now knows that some other man is amongst the Dharma folk and is not truly Dharma, and isn't even in the correct time at all. Can that be valuable to Richard? Absolutely. First, if he needs a man on the "inside", he now has one. If Sawyer's buddy Locke is supposed to be the leader of the Others, then certainly this Sawyer/LaFleur guy will want to help the Others when the need arises, right? In addition to having a mole amongst the D.I., consider the date - it's 1974. Go back to "Cabin Fever" again. We see teenage Locke, who is most likely 18 years old, placing that scene in 1974 as well. Richard now knows that Sawyer is waiting for Locke on The Island. Last time Richard saw Locke, he had given up on him because little Locke chose the knife instead of the compass. But now that Sawyer has told Richard about Locke's importance (thus reinforcing the concept that Locke is "special"), Richard decides to give Locke a second chance. So he reaches Locke through his science teacher, inviting him to "science camp". But Locke wasn't interested; it wasn't his time yet. But Sawyer did plant the seed in Richard's mind that Locke is supposed to become the leader of the Others. Because of Sawyer, Richard has faith in John. Because of Sawyer, John will one day lead the Others.

But Richard - is he really a good guy?  In "Not in Portland", it's pretty obvious that he wanted Juliet on The Island so badly that he arranged to have her husband hit by a bus to make it happen. Richard has a bad temper. He lied (Jughead) to Daniel when he said they killed 18 US soldiers and Miles said it was 40 of them killed just a few weeks before. Why the lie? And he doesnt take no for an answer, in Juliet's case. He was really pushy. And occasionally, he gives off a vibe that he is not human at all - maybe he's "dead", Locke style.

(Oh, and speaking of Juliet, why was she chosen by the Others to work on the fertility issue? I know that she managed to help her otherwise sterile (cancer) sister conceive a child, but did delivering Horace and Amy's son on The Island have anything to do with her being chosen? Is that child special? Is that child ... JACOB?)

One more question for Richard: What is his relationship with Charles and Ellie?

Benjamin Linus
So little Ben was born 32 miles of the Portland. Somewhere in the early 60s. 11 Years later he came to The Island. That puts him in the mid 1970s just enough for him to meet new "friends". He got to know Jim LaFleur, the head of security. So back in 2004 when he saw James "Sawyer" Ford's file, he knew it was the same old Jim from his childhood. I assume he met the other out-of-time'ers as well (Jack, Kate, Hurley, Juliet, Miles, Sayid, etc.). And that's how he always had a plan - he was cheating! He already had knowledge of the future, from his childhood memories. His past was the Oceanic 815'ers future. He was always ten steps ahead of them...

Miscellaneous questions:
Why / how did Ellie leave the island?

Lost Props

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 14:34:16 GMT

Hurley_Lottery_Ticket
Originally uploaded by r3mdh

Here's a scan of my replica of Hurley's Lotto Ticket from ABC's "Lost". The numbers are cursed and are what led him to The Island.

Dear_Mr_Sawyer
Originally uploaded by r3mdh

Here's a scan of Bonnie's replica of James "Sawyer" Ford's "Dear Mr. Sawyer" letter that he wrote as a child. He finally did get to read the letter to "Mr. Sawyer" in the Season 3 episode, "The Brig".

316

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:30:58 GMT

Don't read anymore unless you've watched the Season 5 episode of Lost titled "316".

By now you have seen Lost Season 5, episode "316". Best episode ever, IMHO - and you *know* how much I love "The Constant". Things that I saw in this episode:

Apparently, my theory about The Island rotating and not moving was debunked by Mrs. Hawking. She seemed to indicate that The Island changed positions in both space and time. Oh well, at least I tried. :-)

Did you catch all of the similarities between Ajira 316 and Oceanic 815? Here's what I caught:

(Note: first item/person is Ajira 316 and second is Oceanic 815)

Jack = Jack (the only one not taking on the characteristic of another Oceanic 815'er)
Frank Lapidus = Seth Norris
Kate = Charlie (she seemed VERY drugged-out!)
Hurley = Charlie (guitar)
Sayid = Kate (in shackles)
Sayid's US Marshall = Kate's US Marshall
Sun holding Jin's wedding ring for safe keeping = Rose holding Bernard's wedding ring for safe keeping
John Locke's corpse = Christian Shephard's corpse
New Arabic guy (who gives consolation to Jack in line at the Airport about his dead "friend" Locke) = Ana Lucia? (Didn't she console Jack about Christian?)
Ben = Hurley (arrived just in the nick of time and looking all disheveled)

Confirmed answers:

Yes, the Dharma Initiative had stations that were not on The Island. The Lamppost is in Los Angeles.
No, not all of the O6 got back to The Island. Aaron was not on board that plane. I guess Ben took his place?

New Mysteries:

Where is Aaron?
What about Ji-Yeon?
Who/what brought Sayid, Kate, and Hurley to the Airport? Last we saw them, they all were running away from Ben.
How did Sayid get arrested and deported (or at least paired up with a Marshall) so quickly? And why to Guam? Wouldn't he be going back to Iraq?
What "unfinished business" did Ben have to deal with?
- Was it convincing Kate to leave Aaron and return to The Island? Kate could give Ben that kind of beating - ha.
- Was it making good on his promise to kill Charles Widmore's daughter, Penny? Better not! Maybe he tried and Desmond kicked his ass.
Are we in the 1970s? Jin's Dharma van and jumpsuit looked mighty new.
How much time has passed between the time when Locke turned the wheel and the 316'ers returned to The Island? Jin's hair looked a lot longer than when the Freighter blew up.
Did the Ajira plane crash or were the important people teleported off of the plane, much like Ben/Locke teleported after turning the wheel?
Is Frank Lapidus on the Island and alive? If the plane did not crash and he simply teleported off with the other important people, who is flying Ajira 316 now?
- Do we care? (Ben didn't care about the other people.)
- Personally, I hope that no one else except new Arabic guy survived - I don't want to see any more "Log Carrying Guys".
What happens to Desmond now? Certainly this isn't the end of his story...

General Observations:

It was cool that this episode started off EXACTLY like the pilot episode. In fact, I thought we might be rehashing the pilot at first. Jack in his suit, all by himself in the jungle, with screams in the distance (turned out to be Hurley). Once Jack got to the edge of the waterfall, however, it was obvious that this was new footage. (There was no waterfall at the beach after Oceanic 815 crashed.)
Jack's dive from the cliff into the water to save Hurley from drowning was absolutely awesome. The stuntman who did that dive deserves a standing ovation.
I loved the fact that Hurley bought all of the extra seats on board so that no one else would have to die as a result of The Numbers/Curse. He had to play it off as being a jerk, but in reality he was saving their lives. Hmmm... just like Charlie did to him before Charlie set off for The Looking Glass (Charlie was a jerk, but was ultimately saving Hurley's life - had he gone with Charlie, he would have been a sitting duck for Patchy who was firing shots from the beach at Desmond).
The Lamppost station was really cool. Gave that same kind of "cool" vibe that Daniel Faraday's lab at Oxford gave when Desmond visited him in 1996 in "The Constant".

Further reading to enhance your enjoyment of the episode, in reference to the Biblical suggestions in this episode:
Thomas, one of Jesus' deciples and otherwise known as "Doubting Thomas" (referenced by Ben in the church outside of The Lamppost)
John 3:16, a juxtaposition of John Locke and Ajira Flight 316.

Patents for Reconfigurable Humanoid Robot Toys

Tue, 17 Feb 2009 17:36:55 GMT

Google Patents is a fun place to search through. You can find all kinds of interesting stuff there, including Reconfigurable Humanoid Robot Toys, otherwise known to children of the '80s as The Transformers. Here's what I've found so far:

Autobots:
Beachcomber
Blaster
Bluestreak
Cloudraker
Cosmos
Fastlane (Clone)
Gears
Guzzle
Hubcap
Hound
Ironhide/Ratchet
Inferno
Jazz
Jetfire
Metroplex
Mirage
Nightbeat
Optimus Prime
Outback
Perceptor
Pipes
Powerglide
Punch/Counterpunch
Quickmix
Roadbuster (Dorvack Mugen Calibur)
Seaspray
Sideswipe
Sunstreaker
Tailgate
Throttlebot (whats-his-name)
Throttlebot Searchlight
Throttlebot Chase
Throttlebot Freeway
Throttlebot Rollbar
Throttlebot Goldbug
Topspin
Tracks
Trailbreaker
Ultra Magnus
Warpath
Wheeljack

Dinobots/Monsterbots:
Grimlock
Slag
Sludge
Snarl
Swoop
Grotesque
Doublecross
Repungas

Omnibots:
Downshift
Camshaft
Overdrive

Powerdashers:
Powerdasher jet
Powerdasher car
Powerdasher drill

Headmasters/Targetmasters:
Apeface
Brainstorm
Chromedome
Crosshairs
Fortress Maximus
Hardhead
Highbrow
Mindwipe
Misfire
Pointblank
Skullcruncher
Sureshot
Triggerhappy
Weirdwolf

Powermasters:
Dreadwing

Combiners/Gestault:
*Constructicons*
Devestator
Bonecrusher
Hook
Long Haul
Scrapper
Scavenger
Mixmaster

*Aerialbots*
Superion
Fireflight
Skydive
Airraid
Slingshot
Silverbolt

*Stunticons*
Menasor
Motormaster
Dragstrip
Breakdown
Wildrider
Dead End

*Technobots*
Computron
Strafe
Afterburner
Nosecone
Scattershot
Lightspeed

*Terrocons*
Abominus
Rippersnapper
Blot
Hun Grr
Sinnertwin
Cutthroat

*Protectobots*
Defensor
Streetwise
Hotspot
Blades
First Aid
Groove

*Combaticons*
Bruticus
Onslaught
Brawl
Swindle
Vortex
Blastoff

*Predacons*
Predaking
Tantrum
Headstrong
Rampage
Divebomb
Razorclaw

Cassettes:
Beastbox
Eject
Grandslam
Laserbeak/Buzzsaw
Overkill
Ramhorn
Raindance
Ratbat
Ravage
Rumble/Frenzy
Slamdance
Slugfest
Steeljaw
Squakbox
Squalktalk

Triple-Changers:
Astrotrain
Blitzwing
Broadside
Sandstorm
Octane
Omitted Triple Changer

Insecticons:
Bombshell
Kickback
Shrapnel

Decepticons:
Battletrap
Crankcase
Dirge
Flywheels
Megatron
Imagine if Megatron had been a revolver!
Pounce
Ramjet
Ruckus
Runasomething
Runatheotherone
Snapdragon
Sixshot
Soundwave
Starscream/Thundercracker/Skywarp
Thrust
Trypticon
Wingspan

I still haven't found the following: Shockwave, Hot-Rod, Rodimus Prime, Galvatron, Scourge, Cyclonus, Bumblebee, Brawn and a few others... but I'm sure they're in there somewhere.

Geocaching

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 04:27:31 GMT

Went Geocaching for the first time in what seems like years. Maybe it has been that long. It's something that I discovered about 7 years ago and started doing with my ex-wife. I guess that's why I stopped...I didn't want to do anything that WE used to do. But, enough time has passed that I don't think of it as OUR thing anymore, but MY thing. Bonnie seems interested, particularly because it involves exercise which makes me happy. I can -- and have -- Geocached solo, but it's more fun to go with a group or at least a partner-in-crime. :-)

Anyway, found 2 caches today, both less than 2 miles from home. Felt good to get out of the house and do a little hiking. When the weather breaks, I'd like to involve Bonnie's kids and my nephew Carter. I know they'd get a kick out of going "treasure hunting".

Here are pics from the first cache and from the second cache.

Cowboy Hats and Cowboy Boots

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 22:37:01 GMT

Today's George Carlin Pearls of Wisdom...

Cowboy Hats and Cowboy Boots

"Getting pretty tired of these guys walking around in cowboy hats and cowboy boots. You ever see these jack-offs? Can't we kill some of these motherfuckers? Walking around in a fucking cowboy hat. Grown men. It's not even Halloween for chrissakes! I say: 'Hey Tex, grow up and get yourself a wardrobe consistent with the century you're living in.' Why do certain men feel the need to dress up as mythic figures? You don't see anyone walking around in a pirate costume, do you? When was the last guy you ran into who had on a viking outfit? Make-believe cowboys. Closest they ever got to a cow was when they stopped to take a piss at an Arby's."

--George Carlin

"Moving" The Island

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 19:13:46 GMT

I'm posting this here before I post to the Dark UFO Lost site to prove that I came up with this originally. This is all my idea and came to me after I spent some time looking at the album cover to Pink Floyd's "The Dark Side of the Moon".

What if we're misinterpreting the idea of "moving" The Island? What if "moving" it does not mean re-locating it, but instead TURNING it?

And what if The Island is a prism into time (or another dimension or something we haven't thought of)?

At the end of Season 2, Ben provided Michael and Walt a boat with which to escape The Island. He said to follow a compass bearing of 305 degrees and if he did EXACTLY that, he and Walt would find rescue. That specific compass bearing is the only way into or out of The Island. Unless you follow it exactly, The Island is invisible. Why? Because The Island is a prism through which light (time?) shines through. If you're facing it from one angle, you see red light shine through. If you're facing it from a different angle, green light. At another angle, you might not see ANY light at all. When you shine light into a prism (see the album cover to Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" - which is what caused me to think of this whole theory in the first place!), many colors come out. But, VIOLET is the color that refracts closest to the prism itself. (I'm sure there's some physicist out there that could explain wavelengths of visible light and would be able to explain why that color is violet.) So, if The Island is the prism into time, it makes sense that the sky *there* would turn purple when light is shown through it (that "light" being the energy stored up inside the Swan Station or the Orchid Station, or both) since violet is the color you see when you're standing ON the prism. More on this in a second.

Michael and Walt escaped by following Ben's 305 degree direction.

A moment later, Locke decided to NOT push the button and Desmond had to turn the key and completely release the energy stored up in the Swan Station. Electromagnetic energy pulsed through The Island and the sky above The Island turned Violet.

My theory is that when the Swan Station turned Violet, The Island moved. I know that Darlton have emphatically said this is not the case, but I think they were meaning that The Island didn't change locations on Planet Earth. Instead, I surmise that The Island did in fact ROTATE. This rotation released radiation through the prism (The Island itself) and to those on The Island, that light was purple. But to the people in Penny's listening station, the wavelength of radiation that shone through could have been red, orange, yellow, green, blue, violet, or a wavelength outside of visible light. For the short few seconds that The Island turned, it was visible to the outside world, just like a lighthouse is visible when it flips on it's rotating beacon light. Once the energy was expelled, The Island went invisible again, except to people looking at it from it's new compass bearing - 325 degrees. The Freighter people knew to come in at 325 degrees because Charles Widmore figured out the new compass bearing from the information obtained from Penny's people. Perhaps the Swan Station failsafe key turns the island exactly 20 degrees and knowing that the radiation coming from The Island started at 305 degrees, he now knew what the new compass bearing would be.

Now, to the Orchid Station and Benjamin Linus... When Ben turned the Frozen Donkey Wheel, he was again TURNING The Island. His intent was to once again make it invisible to the Freighter and to Charles Widmore. Again, the sky turned Violet. Think about this: you know those Sit and Spin toys by Playskool that children sit on and spin? What's in the center? A WHEEL. And when they turn the wheel, what happens? THEY (The Island!) rotates. When Ben turned the Wheel, he rotated The Island again. But unlike the Swan Station, Ben turned The Island an unknown number of degrees - perhaps even unknown to Ben himself! And that's why Mrs. Hawking had to do all of her research with the old Apple Computers and the Pendulum to figure out every possible compass heading that could be used to get onto and off of The Island. Now that she figured out what it is, she found an airline that would be flying at that exact compass bearing and OVER The Island and the "70 hours" is how long Ben has to get the Oceanic 6 boarded on that plane so that they can return to The Island.

So, to summarize, when Jacob told Locke that The Island had to be moved, he wasn't referring to another location on Earth, but *turned* to a different angle to keep outsiders from being able to figure out (accidentally or purposefully) how to find/see it.

Pink Panther 2

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 18:38:27 GMT

Mosey on over to Rotten Tomatoes to read some rather funny reviews of a completely horrible movie, The Pink Panther 2, which currently sports an awesome 6% positive reviews. Here are some of the funnier reviews:

"Be warned, The Pink Panther 2 will activate your gag reflex rather than tickle your funny bone."

"When The Pink Panther 2 repeats the "ham-bur-gare" gag from the first film, you know you're in for a long 90 minutes."

"I laughed once, at an unexpected gag, involving a ricocheting bullet, that was a nice play on an old gunfighting cliche. The rest of the film was a slow-bleeding gut shot. "

"It woulda been less insulting for Martin to dig up Peter Sellars' corpse, build a bone xylophone out of the skeletal remains, and bang out Henry Mancini's "Pink Panther" theme during the Super Bowl halftime show."

"The Pink Panther 2 is an improvement over The Pink Panther, but that's kind of like saying your new boyfriend Bernie Madoff is an improvement over your last boyfriend, Jeffrey Dahmer."

"I have seen taxidermy livelier than this moribund mess which further sullies the reputation of everyone associated with this unwelcome sequel."

"This movie is so bad that I feel awful taking up Rotten Tomatoes' space with this quote. I will stop now. What a waste of great talent!"

"Pathetic... The lack of imagination and inspiration is stunning."

"[It's] admittedly funnier than the 2006 original. But that movie was so dispiritingly, soul-suckingly bad, there was nowhere left to go but up."

"The Pink Panther 2 plays like an undeserved victory lap for a series that only limped to the finish line the last time. "

OUCHIE.